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Bullies

Thursday, April 11th, 2013

First, watch this video and then this video.

We hear a lot about bullies these days. For various reason. For various causes. Physically abusive. Emotionally abusive. Relationally abusive. Verbally abusive.

Both videos told multiple stories. I think one of the most poignant is the danger we all face from bullies.

Abusive parents.

Abusive fellow students.

Abusive siblings.

Abusive teachers.

Abusive “pastors.”

I read today (Thursday) that many are taking shots at Rick Warren for the suicide death of his life-long mentally ill son. It has come from the religious community. (Shame on you!) It has come from the LGBT community. (Yeah, I read the comments).

Come on people! This is a man, yes he is a pastor, but a father (and mother) whose son took his own life after battling depression all his life. Doctors. Medicine. Clinics. Treatment. All were temporary fixes for what was “wrong” from the beginning. But for the religious world to castigate him and for others to use this as a bully pulpit to condemn him because of his stand against gay marriage is unconscionable.

I am speaking more from the religious viewpoint here (for obvious reasons). I have always heard it said, “The church is the only army that shoots its own wounded.” When I read that Rick and Kay have taken shots lobbed from those who call themselves Christians, I was appalled. I applaud those, like Louie Giglio and Beth Moore, who took a stand against that. So many others. It is sad though that a few “jerks” will be used to represent the Christian community in this story. Instead of this being the time for the followers of Christ to shine in their actions of grace and compassion, we are seen as heartless idiots who don’t care about our own people. Frankly, I don’t always agree with Rick Warren. And I am pretty doggone sure not everyone agrees with me. (I could make a catty comment here, but this is not the time). But holy mackerel! Talk about shooting when a man is down! Those who do-religious or irreligious-ought to be ashamed of themselves. Religious people using it as one more example of God’s wrath on an unfaithful servant. Religious and irreligious people who use it to satisfy their agenda. Take a hike! Go back to your pit!

I would like to apologize for my “heatedness” in this post…but I won’t. There are some times I find myself getting a little “hot” and this is one of them. To all the “Christians” who are shooting…shame on you!!! To all those who are using this as a bully pulpit because Rick did not agree with your choice…shame on you too!!

Maybe if we had some character (like the dude in the video). And maybe if we reached out (like the young lady in the video), we might actually find it feels good. And for some, it is actually being Christ-like. Any thoughts?

Posted in Christian living, Church, Friendship, Leadership, Miscellaneous, Story | 23 Responses »

Hero

Monday, April 8th, 2013

Our world abounds with SuperHeroes. Captain America. Iron Man. Spiderman. Batman. The list goes on. My world has superheroes also.

I am the husband of the original Wonder Woman. It is a wonder how the woman put up with me for almost 40 years. She even works at a job that she dislikes so we can have insurance (which is essential at our age).

I am the father of two fantastic daughters. I can never even begin to tell you how proud I am of both of them. They are both heroes in my eyes.

This post is about one of those daughters, Tami. First, watch this video.

A little over four years ago, I believe, Tami was diagnosed with Medullary Sponge Kidney Disease. Yeah, that is what I thought. What in the world is that? It totally changed her world. Through trial and error (lots of error on the medical end of it, i.e. you can eat this…no you can’t eat this…yes you can…you get the drift), she suffered through some horrible bouts with kidney stones. Finally, she decided to take matters into her own hands and through some tough times figured out what she can/cannot eat. For example, she cannot have chocolate , and certain fruits and vegetables. She has also figured out soy and gluten are enemies. Along the way she also began running and lost around 30 pounds. She began running/walking 5Ks. Last Thanksgiving, she ran with her sister in the Turkey Trot in Columbus, Ohio. I think it was about 5 miles or so.

This past Sunday Tami did 13.1 miles, a mini-marathon. Jo watched her progress on her phone. I was so proud of her I even announced it before I preached. She completed it under 3 hours. She did three things I cannot do: run, finish, and do it all under 3 hours. Late edition: for more on this check out here.

She isn’t done though. After teaching since 1998, she has decided her experience needs to be shared with others, particularly children. Thanks to the generosity of someone, she has enrolled in an online course that will require one year of schooling (she will be able to keep her current job) with a goal to become a health/life coach, focusing on children’s health. She wants to help children and parents learn proper eating habits to deal with allergic reactions, medical conditions, etc that are so hard to find answers for (just like hers). To learn a little more about her dream, check out this post, this one, and this one.

She is my hero…in more ways than one. In honor of her, I want to dedicate this song to her. I told her she needs this on her play list when she runs.

Who is a hero to you? Have you let them know?

Posted in Christian living, Family, Little Bit of Fun, Pick me Up, Story | 30 Responses »

Restored

Thursday, April 4th, 2013

Is there any greater story to hear than someone who was down and out being restored?

One of the saddest stories I have read is of Stephen Foster, the writer of Oh Susanna, Camptown Races, My Old Kentucky Home, Jeanie with the Light Brown Hair, and others. His fortunes sank, while his love for booze rose. He died a derelict on Bowery Street.

Contrast that to the story we often hear of Abe Lincoln and his rise and fall and rise and fall and rise and fall and rise (you get the point) with his political career. We like to read or hear of people rising out of the ashes to make something of themselves.

Perhaps no person in the Bible represents this more than Peter. You know…

Open mouth insert foot Peter.

Foot-shaped mouth Peter.

Confess Jesus is the Christ and deny He knows Jesus. Yeah, that Peter.

For those who know the Bible there may not be a story more well-loved and appreciated than the one found in John 21. There is hardly a passage to be found in the Bible with more grace offered than Jesus and Peter on the seashore. Jesus took a broken man, a man who had returned to his beloved fishing-

maybe out of grief.

maybe shame.

maybe defeat.

Maybe all the above.

Doesn’t really matter though. Not to Jesus. He had one goal in mind…Peter. More specifically…Peter’s restoration. He needed it. Only Peter can really know the depth of his anguish and shame of his denial of Jesus after so boldly declaring, “Even if everyone else falls away I will not!”

I love this story!! I can’t wait to talk about it Sunday. But the real question is not “Peter, do you love me more than these?” The real question is “Bill, do you love me more than these?” That sound you heard was a huge gulp.

Have you been restored?

Have you been able to point someone to the ONE who does restore and watch them turn their life around? He is in the Restoration business.

I’d appreciate your prayers for Sunday. Thanks.

Posted in Easter, Preaching, Scripture look, Sermon Series/Topic, Story | 28 Responses »

Unshockable

Monday, March 11th, 2013

They walk in hand in hand. You don’t give it a second thought until you look a little closer and realize they are a same-sex couple. What do you do?

You thought you recognized the face. In fact, you are almost sure you were staring at it just this past week in the newspaper. Then it dawns on you! Of course. He/she was plastered across the front of the paper for a DWI.

The shame written across the face was evident. The downtrodden and down-looking eyes were another piece of evidence. Something about them said, “I don’t belong here. Please judge me so I can agree and never come back.” You realize they were in the paper for a child porn case.

The young woman can’t look you in the eye. You try to welcome her, but her guilt is too great. After all, what would you think if you knew she had just had an abortion? Or was a teenager who had had a sexual encounter and now the consequence is weighing on her. She is scum and everyone else will think so too.

All scenarios. But all scenarios that we probably have faced in the past or may face in the future. I gotta tell you, in all honesty, I would not have given a rip about these people several years ago. I could preach God would forgive, but that didn’t mean I had to have a part in it. Plainly put, I was a Pharisee. Lock, stock, and barrel.

I’m not going to presume how you would handle these or similar situations. As a pastor I have a unique view of things in many ways. That was how I got to be a Pharisee. But you can’t be one when God ~~slaps~~ slams you upside the head with a 2×4. Slam He did and it was not a pretty sight.

I’ve been reading Mud and the Masterpiece by John Burke. WOW!! I’m hooked! It’s not the first time John has done that. Later on that. Read this passage please. Substitute the above examples in the place of the woman. Jesus’ response would have been what? While the above examples are mine, the reference to Luke 7 that I am about to give is John’s.

Jesus looks beyond the mud to the masterpiece this woman is. He doesn’t ignore her sin (“Go and sin no more”), but His parable shows the debt she (and the Pharisees) owe could not be paid. John makes this statement:

The reason I believe Jesus wants His followers to be unshockable has nothing to do with hating sin or not hating sin. It has to do with seeing sin for what it is-it’s foreign matter. Sin is not our true identity-that’s the whole problem. We need to help people identify with God’s image in them. (The masterpiece under the mud-my note)

That is not sugarcoating sin. It is about not allowing it to be their/my identity. This post is getting long so I will continue it later this week. Till then, what are your thoughts? How would you react to the above scenarios? And if you get a chance, please listen to this.

Posted in Christian living, Church, Friendship, Jesus, Just Wondering, Leadership, Sin, Story | 26 Responses »

Messy

Sunday, March 10th, 2013

As I was growing up, the comic strip options were not as varied as they are today. We had our Blondie (and Dagwood). We had Dick Tracy. And of course, there were others. But probably the most popular at the time was the Peanuts gang by Charles M. Shultz. (There was even a bestseller called The Gospel According to Peanuts, in which the author connected Peanuts to the Bible). Each day Shultz would come up with a new “adventure” for his gang- Charlie Brown, Lucy, Linus, Snoopy, Pigpen, Beethoven, and others. He would often feature Lucy at her five-cent psychology booth, where Charlie Brown would stop for “advice.” I had issues with Lucy anyway, particularly with her insistence on getting Charlie Brown to trust her, and then pulling the football away at the last minute. So having a “pop” psychology stand rubbed me wrong.

In this one particular strip, Lucy waxes “wisely” to Charlie. “Life is like a deck chair, Charlie. On the cruise ship of life, some people place their deck chair at the rear of the ship so they can see where they’ve been. Others place their deck chair at the front of the ship so they can see where they’re going.”

She looks at her puzzled client and asks, “Which way is your deck chair facing?”

Without hesitating, Charlie replies, “I can’t even get my deck chair unfolded.”

Been there done that??? I’m not ashamed to admit there have been times I have not had it all together. I have been unable to get my deck chair unfolded. Charlie and I have been soul mates from time to time.

But you know what? I’m okay with that. And I believe Jesus is okay with that as well. Nowhere in the Bible does it say, “Every Christ-follower must have it all together, all the time.” The Christian life has its ups and downs just like a life lived outside of Jesus’ influence. Nobody (except some whack jobs) says life will be all peaches and cream. The truth is that life is like a batch of roses, because even with roses there are thorns.

I made a point this past Sunday to say this several times:

JESUS IS NOT IN THE BUSINESS TO REFORM LIVES. HE IS IN THE BUSINESS TO TRANSFORM LIVES.

Mary Magdalene. The Gadarene demoniac. Saul/Paul. Me. You. Thousands, maybe millions of others. Not reformed, but transformed. Still deck chair-challenged from time to time, but working on getting them to stay open. I don’t know about you, but I’ll take that!

Is your deck chair open? What direction is it facing in? Are you trying to reform or have you been transformed?

Posted in Christian living, Jesus, Miscellaneous, Scripture look, Sermon Series/Topic, Story | 37 Responses »

Hold

Wednesday, March 6th, 2013

“Thank you for calling (fill in the blank). We are sorry that all of our operators are busy assisting other customers at this point. (Yeah right). Please wait and your call will be answered in the order in which it was received.”

Don’t you just love hearing those words? Probably about as much I liked hearing a few years ago, “Well Bill, that tori has to come out ($$$$$) and when it is done you will have work done on your teeth, i.e. braces. (More $$$$$$$).” That is how I feel about being put on hold.

It seems like I spend 1/2 my life on hold.

“Will you help do me do this?”

“Can I let you know?” (translated: probably not, but I want to give the “air” of thinking about it)

I do have a point to this seemingly random post. Wednesday morning I was reading this Scripture during my Encounter Time. Most people, when they read that passage, will latch onto verses 1-2. And rightly so. There is so much beautiful imagery there that makes sense to anyone pursuing an alive relationship with God. But I know some, and at times I could also fall into that box, who find verses 5-6 more their speed. It builds in intensity with verses 8-11. In all honesty, is there anyone reading this post who has not felt the sting of being “on hold” with God? There have been times verse 9 describes my life much more than verse 8.

All the screaming in the world doesn’t make things move any faster.

All the pounding of the fist doesn’t make God say, “Okay, okay. I get your point. You are royally ticked and I give up.”

All the pouting we might do doesn’t make God feel any worse for the “hold pattern”.

All the threats we throw out don’t have God back-pedaling.

All the bribes and trade-offs don’t have Him finagling in His mind on whether to take us up on our offer.

What God does want us to come to, and what we need to come to, is the reality and truth of verse 11b: “Hope in God; for I shall again praise Him, my salvation and my God.”

So, rather than seeing HOLD as a bad thing, maybe we can change our perspective by adding a few words:

HOLD ON TO HOPE.

What are your thoughts on “hold?” How has “hold” been beneficial to you? What do you “hold” on to when the silence is deafening?

Posted in Christian living, God, Just Wondering, Scripture look, Story | 16 Responses »

Mulligans

Sunday, March 3rd, 2013

Have you ever played golf? If so, you know what a mulligan is.

DON’T YOU WISH THERE WERE MULLIGANS IN LIFE?

I do. I have plenty of regrets I would like to avoid. Perhaps that is one of the reasons I have been captivated by the whole Back to the Future trilogy. The idea of traveling back through time to change things intrigues me. I know I would tell my 5th or 6th grade self not to touch that magazine. I would tell my high school self…nah never mind. Anyway, the idea of taking a mulligan, of having a second chance sort of “rings our bell.” Least it does mine.

In preparation for my sermon this past Sunday, I read a story of a man whose name was inadvertently printed in the obituary column of his local newspaper. It may have been the result of a prank or just an accident. But, one day, this woke up and read his own obituary. You can imagine how that would ruin your day. There he was, minding his own business, drinking his coffee and munching on his Captain Crunch cereal (or if he is older his Fiber 80). He opened the newspaper and, lo and behold, he was listed as now deceased.

Not amused, the man got into his care, drove down to the newspaper office, and demanded to see the editor.

The editor came out and said, “Yes sir, Can I help you?”

“I am outraged. You printed my name in the obituary column. As you can see, I am very much alive and well. This is going to be a cause of great embarrassment for me. I will probably even lose business.”

“Sir, I’m sorry. It was an error, but there is nothing I can do.”

Naturally, that explanation did not appease the victim. He continued to rant and rave and even threatened to sue the paper.

Finally the editor said, “Cheer up, buddy. Tomorrow, I’ll put your name in the birth column and give you a fresh start.”

That about says it all don’t you think? Who of us wouldn’t like to have a fresh start? We will take that second chance. We will scream out “Mulligan!”

While the whole idea of going back in time is mere fantasy (bummer!), the idea of a fresh start is not. Jesus offers us that fresh start. He takes our need for mulligans and says, “Here. I’ll take care of that for you.”

Of course, the best way to not need a mulligan is to not live a life of regret. We can’t change our past-we all know that. But we can have a say in our future. How do you plan to live your future?

Posted in Christian living, Monday "I Needed That" Moment, Sermon Series/Topic, Story | 23 Responses »

Rebels

Thursday, February 28th, 2013

As you can probably gather, I am starting a new series this coming Sunday called “Reclaimed.” My plan is to divide it into two with Resurrection Sunday being the splitting point. March will be spent with characters reclaimed by Jesus before the cross, and April will be spent with people reclaimed after the cross/resurrection. When I was working on my sermons last October or so, I had a totally different series planned. It is a pastor’s nightmare (well at least one of them) to realize that what he had worked on was garbage and needed to be redone. Needless to say, when a series doesn’t turn my crank, I certainly can’t expect it to light a fire under anyone else. So I went back to the drawing board. This is the series I felt God leading me to. First up…

R.E.B.E.L.S.

Now before you say, “Hey, wait a minute. These people weren’t affected by meeting Jesus”…you are correct. Just don’t shoot me when you find out why. See, they weren’t affected directly by Him, but they were used to tell a story by Him. Now you know I can justify about anything!!

The passage is here, but I suspect it is one you are already familiar with. Everyone calls this the Parable of the Prodigal Son. I think it is a much better picture of the Loving Father. For several reasons, but the most glaring is there were two sons who were rebels. One was very blatant; the other hidden. One was an outward rebel; the other more an inside rebel. One was an “I’ll take mine now” rebel; the other was an “I can’t wait until he dies” rebel. Point being: neither one was more rebellious or more hideous than the other.

The beautiful part of this story is the loving father. His actions with his younger son showed he was not a tyrant; while his actions with his older son showed he was insightful and knew all along where his heart really was.

In essence we are all rebels. Some of us are more blatant in our rebellion. “Give it to me now!” Others put on facades of outward acquiescence, while inwardly we are crying for freedom from all this religious garbage. Through it all is the loving Father who wants to make something of our lives.

Hope you are one of those who are willing to submit. Thanks for praying for this weekend. There is always some ~~anxiety~~ anticipation when beginning a new series. Oh, I am also introducing the message with this video. Enjoy and be amazed.

Thanks to Dan for the banner.

Posted in Preaching, Sermon Series/Topic, Sin, Story | 16 Responses »

Choose

Sunday, October 28th, 2012

No… not

CHOOSE LIFE

CHOOSE DEATH

but

CHOOSE FORGIVENESS

I know what you may be thinking…Dead horse Bill. You have beaten that one. Maybe…

but…

this weekend it came to fruit. Certain events brought about the opportunity to extend grace and forgiveness and I bask in the FREEDOM that comes from doing so. A card that needed to be written was written. But on Saturday night…Hello Momma! New Beginnings Pregnancy Center used our building to show October Baby. I was moved, not because I or my wife have faced the abortion issue personally, but because a father and daughter were involved. That was gut-wrenching in itself. As a father it is always hard to let your daughters go-whether to a man to get married, or to move away and start a life on her own. I have experienced both, and trust me when I say that neither one was easy to do. I have bragged about my feelings for my girls before. I don’t want to bore you with those again.

But there is one thing I will never stop talking about:

THE FREEDOM THAT COMES FROM FORGIVENESS!

NEVER. STOP.

TALKING.

ABOUT. IT.

The movie had a section in it that really hit me hard. I realize it might be a spoiler for some of you who may plan someday to see the movie. Maybe it will motivate you to see it sooner. Some of you may have no intention at all in seeing the movie. That’s okay because this small snippet is the turning point (IMHO) of the whole movie. If you are able, may I ask you to take almost five minutes to watch this clip?

This is not a post on the “rightness or wrongness” of abortion. There are plenty of other blogs that do that. It is on the power of forgiveness. I know I just wrote about forgiveness and how not everything gets hunky-dory immediately (sometimes not at all). But the road to healing is paved by starting with forgiveness.

One last time (for now): what was your take-away from the movie clip. Do you know someone you need to forgive? Have you ever forgiven someone and known forgiveness because of it?

Posted in Christian living, Doctrine, Just Wondering, Story | 21 Responses »

Linda’sStory

Tuesday, June 26th, 2012

The story comes this week from Linda Mew. Linda is an almost daily commenter here. I am not even sure how she even heard of my blog while living in Canada, but I’m not complaining. Linda is forthright and passionate about her comments. She knows I don’t always agree with her but allows me to disagree and say so. She has an interesting story to tell.

I was raised in a small rural community in the province of Saskatchewan, Canada. My dad was alcoholic and abusive toward my mother during those years. It was in grade 3 when I first consciously encountered God. It was Easter time and the class was asked to draw a cross with flowers on it by our teacher, Mrs. Church. She talked to us students about the cross and I remember she asked us to bow our heads and say a prayer. I did this. I took my picture home and hung it up above my bed. My mother caught me bowing and praying to this picture one day and said ‘your dad better not see you doing this, don’t you get religious’. That was the end of my seeking for Him at that time, but God had his hand on me.

Over the next number of years I see how God helped me at various times. An experience with God early in my life and having had a good mother were instrumental factors in preventing me from becoming involved in promiscuity, drugs and rebellious teenage activity. My parents were divorced when I was thirteen. I never saw my dad again. My mother continued to raise me and my sister on 250 dollars of income per month in 1970. She received no money from my dad after they sold our small farm in Saskatchewan. She received no child support. My sister and I were left on our own during those years while my mother worked and socialized. There were times we didn’t see her for a week. We had lots of opportunity to make really poor decisions, but by God’s grace we both managed to stay away from the worst of these.

My sister moved to Victoria, BC where my mother was living after she had remarried in 1971. A few years passed and my sister was increasingly unhappy. Life was a struggle for a young single woman in Victoria, but she was saved one night and her life changed immediately. She had found something amazing! Then she started phoning me in Alberta and talking to me about Jesus.

My former husband was working as a millwright for a large chemical plant in 1981. Another worker was talking to him about Jesus. This man had started up a house church. My husband liked this man. He started to listen to what he was saying. The man at work knew about being ‘born again’. We were invited to their home on January 2, 1982. It was there around their kitchen table that both my husband and I prayed to God for salvation.

When we left shortly after we were rejoicing! My husband got up the next morning and realized that something was very different. He poured his home made beer and the hard liquor down the kitchen sink. He did not have a drink again for 15 years. An amazing new life began for us. We started attending this small house church.

The first few years of attending this small house church were good. My husband and I were happy and we started a family. Leadership controlled everything in this particular church. Questioning the leadership about what they were teaching or how they saw things was greatly frowned upon. Obedience and loyalty to our church leaders was the test of how ‘spiritual’ and ‘godly’ we believers were becoming. This ‘control model’ of church created a feeling of superiority between those of us believers who could bend our knee to the will of the pastor and those of us who were struggling to do this. There were other serious issues of concern about the leadership in this church as well. We rejoiced whenever someone was brave enough to leave this church. When circumstances brought things to a head in this church for me, I cried out to God and he made a way out for me. My husband didn’t see things quite the way I did. He wanted to stay in this church until we found the ‘right’ time to leave. He knew there were problems but his desire to leave with the pastor’s permission and blessing was keeping him there. He had a need to be thought well of by this man. I refused to attend this church anymore so we left. I got my way with my husband, but it was at a price and cost.

Our marriage had been deteriorating while we attended this church. My husband’s strong need for control and importance in all areas of his life was taking a toll on our marriage. I went into a type of severe depression. My husband was a subtle abuser. I accidentally discovered this abuse one day and trust began flowing out of our marriage relationship. Over the next 15 years we disagreed about what was going on in our marriage. I cried out to God at a time when I was experiencing such mental and emotional distress that I was fearful of my health and my safety. Shortly after this my husband and I separated and then we divorced. We had been married for 30 years. My husband and I are still in the Court over the issues of matrimonial property division and spousal support. I would appreciate your prayers for a settlement of these issues.

God has been good to me. In early 2011 I was done. I was burnt out. I was feeling sick thinking about this legal case. I cried out to God and he provided me with some strength. Part of this ability to keep going came right from God I believe, but part of this ability came through encouragement by someone who has a business as a divorce specialist in Calgary. It seems that just the slightest bit of help encourages me in this legal case. I’ve learned how to relax going through this legal situation. I’ve learned how to accept discretional brow beating and how to be silent while I am being accused of lying by a court Justice. I’ve learned the value of persevering when I don’t want to persevere. I’ve learned that I want to trust God and lean on him going into my future.

What I have learned is God is faithful. God is trustworthy. God is with me. I do struggle at times and I realize that I have some fear for the future, but mostly I am relaxed, happy and confident that my God will see me through whatever lies ahead. I’m looking forward to eternity!

Thanks Linda for opening the window on your story. Any thoughts you (the readers) care to share? It is not too late to be part of this series and tell your story. Email me: pastor@ovcf.org

Posted in Story | 31 Responses »