If you have been following my blog you know I have been doing a series on Second Chances. Rather than put a whole series of links to direct you to each story, I’ll just ask you to go to this post where all but today’s can be linked from. Today’s post is from someone who has rapidly become one of my dearest “friends” via the internet. We have never met in person, but we have spent plenty of time burning up the internet in comments and personal emails. There is no doubt in my mind that if we were to meet it would be as if we had known each other all our lives. Floyd blogs at www.theregoi.com. If you haven’t been reading his you need to. (That’ll cost you Floyd for me saying that). Here’s Floyd writing about his Second Chance.
MOUNT PRIDE
You hear things, can memorize them, think you truly get the meaning behind the words, and still be found weighed, measured, and severely wanting. No wonder Solomon told us wisdom is more valuable than gold or silver.
It’s the things we can’t see, like wisdom, that end up being the most expensive item on the menu, the invisible one that is.
“Pride goeth before a fall’, young man!” I heard more than once.
I thought to myself, “Yeah, yeah, ‘tis better to give than to receive’ – I know – I know, I’ve heard em’ all.”
I knew the lingo, even learned how to act, how to play the part. I really did want to do right, be good, have my talk match my walk. False humility might get you an Oscar, but it can’t begin to crack the code for character.
People with a lot of pride tend to justify their actions, even use some Bible stories to back them up, I know I’m one of them. Folks with all that pride are really just hiding their immense insecurity, wanting others to think much of them.
Around twenty years ago, I was paying a few laborers cash, the street term is “under the table”. It was easy enough to justify, I called it “survival” at the time. A few years later when the IRS came knockin’, they dug up things I thought we’d done by the book. I even had a seasoned bookkeeper swear to it, but that didn’t carry as much weight as a feather with the government.
I thought I was doing pretty well, on my way, my ego was well fed and my pride plump. What I had defined who I was… That’s an ugly trait and contrary to all I knew and had learned, or thought I’d learned. Memorizing isn’t learning – understanding is wisdom.
All that I had was suddenly gone. All that I valued was being taken from me. How I defined myself stripped from me. My pride poured out of me like water into a filthy tan and threadbare carpet that covered the floor in a one bedroom apartment.
I was in the middle of a divorce, lonely, and finally at the end of myself.
“Okay, Father… I surrender… I lay down my pride… Give me strength to move on in humility from my failure,” I mumbled over and over, face down in someone else’s carpet.
The events of the following months after, are nothing short of miraculous in more ways than monetary. The price of the wisdom I’ve gained, I can truly share, is worth more than any amount of money I might ever get my hands on.
And while I struggle with pride as my weakness, I’ll never again be that person who defines myself by what I have. I define myself by Who I serve. I’m reminded of that in many ways, one of which was written for folks like me, “Pride goes before a fall.”
I have this sneaking suspicion Floyd is not alone. Well…at least I would have to stand (or is that be face down) with him.
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