Control

Written by cycleguy on January 5th, 2014

I am not a control freak.  I know some who are.  They have to or desire to to control everything and everyone around them.  Things that happen out of order are anathema.  People who “have the nerve” to step outside the status quo are unnerving.   I have seen some get so bent out of shape they almost start hyperventilating.

I sure am glad I’m not a control freak.

Case in point: the weather this weekend.  In case you don’t know, I live in central Indiana (near Bloomington…please don’t hold that against me).  🙂  We were hit by snow and ice this past Thursday.  I was able to take my sister-in-law home on Friday, and the reason I took her instead of Jo taking her today (Sunday) was because of the weather report saying we were supposed to get 6-10 inches of snow starting Saturday evening, then it was supposed to dip to 20-30 below by Tuesday.  Since I have a 4×4 it was thought I should leave Friday and return either that same day (it is a 6 hour trip one way) or stay the night in Columbus, OH and finish up Saturday with a 4 hour drive.  It was a tough decision: spend the night visiting my grandson or turn around and come back home.  🙂

But I digress.  The weather (snow).  Well, it finally started falling Sunday morning about 6:30.  Snow on a Sunday is the bane of a preacher.  You know how it works: the same snow which keeps people home on Sunday will not keep them from work on Monday.  🙂   But that’s life.  Nothing I can do will ever change that.  It is also  true what Doc Brown says in Back to the Future: “Since when can the weatherman predict the weather?”

I have no control over the weather.  I quit complaining long time ago about that.  What good will it do?  Get me all riled up for nothing?  I mean, will it make any difference at all if I go out and yell at the falling snow?  Curse the whole time I am shoveling?  Get agitated at God for not putting an umbrella or bubble over our area so it won’t snow?

I. HAVE. NO. CONTROL. OVER. THE. WEATHER.

So, why get upset?  We didn’t call church off this morning. We downgraded to one service only.  Three of us called/texted all the people we had listed as having come regularly lately.   Told them of the change and if they felt unsafe coming don’t get out.  Who knows who will be here or if we have anyone at all?  I’ll just preach this week’s message next week.  🙂

Lesson?  Let go of control, especially of those things you have no control over.  Weather.  Life.  Put your day/life into the hands of the ONE who is in control all the time.  Meanwhile, what we have falling right now would make great snowballs.

Do you have trouble releasing control?

 

33 Comments so far ↓

  1. Daniel says:

    I am one of them there control freaks that you spoke of. You should see me playing Scrabble with my daughter when she places the tiles such that they don’t fit properly in the squares on the game board.

  2. the Old Adam says:

    I only want to control one thing…

    …. ‘everything’.

    Other than that…I am content to let God take charge.

  3. Betty Draper says:

    Interesting I would have called myself a control freak at times but those who know me say I am not. Would I like to control a few things, yes, but could I, of course not. The more I let go of control the more my trust grows. God has never let me down when I trust Him. Great post. Maybe you are suppose to preach you message two weeks in a role. Could be there is more insight you will gain, someone who could not come this Sunday can next week. It won’t be a waste. Blessing.

    • cycleguy says:

      You are right Betty. God will never let us down when we trust Him. I did not preach yesterday. In fact, we ended up cancelling when snow began falling an inch and hour at 7:00 and the worship team members were sliding past the driveway entrance. I will preach it next week.

      • Betty Draper says:

        I always loved when A.M church was cancelled. Sorry nothing against the preacher. When we were staff our Sat and Sunday were our busiest days. Sats we visited our bus riders and got the class room ready for Sunday. Sunday you picked them up, taught the Sunday school, children church, took them home after church and had enough time to eat then head back to church for pm service which was favorite. It was good preparation for the years on the mission field for we learned how to work in the ministry. If a person is not involved in a church functioning they never know all the behind scene activities it takes to have one service. In some tribes the people want to meet every day during the teaching of the bible. But they have nothing else to entertain them like we do here. Even when they were sick they would be brought on pallets to hear the teaching. I dare say if we cut out all other entertainment we would want to go to church more. We are built to be a community of rubbing shoulders with each other. But in developed countries we do it through just what I am doing right now…rubbing shoulders by internet. Take away all other ways to meet, like skype, email, phones, blogging and we would be ready for church every day too. It take mores of being faithful here in the states then it did overseas. I love all the modern ways of communicating but hate the battle that comes with it for my time. Flexibility is only learned in those times we cannot control what ever, like the weather. Hope you had a day of rest as the snow fell.

        • cycleguy says:

          I think you are right about the modern conveniences. Sadly, those things which are supposed to save us time seem to be sucking the life right out of us. 🙁 I could do the “I remember the days when…” game but it won’t do me any good. I wish I had a day of rest Betty. Shoveling the walks at the church building before folks got there (just in case) was the prelude to shoveling twice at home plus digging cars out. I even went out today (4 below right now) to dig out and start my truck. f

  4. No, I’m not a control freak, but I may know one or two.

  5. Kari Scare says:

    My struggle with control seems to be lessening as the years go by, and I am thankful for that. However, my youngest (13) is really struggling with it. It’s affecting him having friendships & getting him in trouble. We are not sure how to handle it. Advice anyone?

    • cycleguy says:

      I wish I had some words of wisdom for you Kari. I didn’t have to go through that with either of my kids, nor really with my self, so I am plum out of advice. Has he seen it from you or your husband? Does he know what is bringing it on? Is he small (compensating) or big (showing strength) for his age? Have you seen it before in his personality? Hope you don’t see that as prying but maybe someone can help.

      • Kari Scare says:

        Probably some from me, though I have improved dramatically in the past few years since he was adopted 4 years ago. He is small and compensating is I’m sure part of it. It also comes from a rather unstable past where others were either mean to him or just let him do whatever he wanted. Yes, we’ve seen it before. It’s gotten better, but it’s causing problems at school & in youth at church. So, I can see why it’s happening, but he’s making no connection with doing anything about it. Is not taking responsibility at all.

        • cycleguy says:

          This is probably a moot question since I suspect I know the answer already (knowing how much you all love him). Has his dad sat down to talk to him about it? How about another man he trusts? Your youth pastor? Does he have a trusted friend?

          • Kari Scare says:

            Talked and talked some more. Feel like we’ve hit a wall, which has happened in other areas before with him. Time & maturity are probably the biggest answers to our prayers. He doesn’t have many close friends, largely because of some of his immaturity issues, which his one of the reasons we’re really working here now. Thanks for talking this out. I need an objective POV.

  6. floyd says:

    Excellent attitude. Bill. We all live with the illusion that we have some control, when in reality we only have what God gives or allows. I spent to many years chasing the wind and cursing it for not letting me catch it that I’ve been worn out to learn the lesson most learn much earlier. But a reminder never hurts…

    Not to add insult to injury, but I think it was around 71 degrees and sunny with a cool breeze here. Mail me a snowball, would ya?

    • cycleguy says:

      You are so right Floyd. If we take the attitude of “this is mine all mine” or “I earned this so it is mine” we will have trouble with giving up control. As to your last comment: thanks for the sucker punch “friend!” I would if I could.

  7. Desert Jim says:

    We had to cancel church a few weeks ago when an ice storm hit Dallas and hung out for the weekend. You could have ice skated on the church parking lot (I should say someone could have, I would not recommend either you or I ice skating anywhere). Our church had a lot of things planned that weekend that had to be cancelled or postponed.

    I think to be a control freak, you have to have the illusion that you are in control at some point. I lost that illusion a long time ago – a little over 22 years ago. Coincidentally, I’ve been married a little over 22 years.

    Throw a snowball for me Bill!

    • cycleguy says:

      Sure throws a wrench into plans. I hope Cindy doesn’t read this, but do remember I have your home address and maybe even her email. 🙂 I’d throw a snowball for you but it is now below zero and after digging out my truck, I am in to stay. The good snowball weather was yesterday. 🙂

  8. I do and I don’t. What I mean is, sometimes it’s easier than others. I don’t normally get bent out of shape about things I can’t control, but I can get frustrated or anxious and if I try to ignore that or pretend it’s not there, it causes all sorts of problems! Easy to say, “it’s all in God’s hands” and harder to actually live it. Thanks Bill.

  9. Debbie says:

    I love and need this reminder, Pastor Bill. Praying that what I can control, my response to whatever is happening, reflects joy and praise to Jesus . .more and more! God bless you and keep you warm and safe!

  10. tcavey says:

    I’m guilty of desiring to control things I’m never meant or able to. 2013 was a year of helping me understand how little control I have (none). All I can control is how I respond to life- go to God or not.
    My choice.
    Trust God or self.
    Let Him have control to do whatever, or continue to be frustrated.
    Thankfully, I’m learning to wait upon Him, to trust Him and to let go.

  11. Nancy says:

    Control of the weather… Not me! I just “Flow with it” and make a snow Marine! I also try to calm the old man down as he frets and worries about it. Now that man I continually try to control to no avail!

  12. It’s strange – I’m a control freak about some things but not about others. I don’t mind the weather, changing schedules, other people’s actions, etc. But health issues really get me. Those I’ve really had to learn to let go.

    • cycleguy says:

      Health issues are a concern for me as well, Loren, especially as I get older. I find though there are some aches and pains I have no control over. 🙁

  13. Jan Frame says:

    🙂 Amen!