The Fi5th Gospel

Written by cycleguy on February 3rd, 2015

thefi5thgospel

There is an old saying:

You never have a second chance to make a first impression.

In lots of practical ways that is a very true statement.

The salesman who approaches you about buying a car.

The clerk who is at a store and about to wait on you at the register.

The server for your meal in the restaurant.

The restaurant itself who tries to “woo” you over in order to have your repeat business.

The church who wants desperately to put their “good foot forward” so you will feel at home.

Lots of places. Lots of people. Take the follower of Christ. How many people have been turned off to a further pursuit of Jesus because of inconsistency, or in keeping with my thoughts: a bad first impression? It is no secret the world’s perception of us is sometimes not very good.

We fight and can’t get along.

We can’t have any fun. (Least their idea of what “fun” is).

We isolate ourselves from reality.

We are mean. (Frankly, after reading some comments on blogs and articles there is some validity to this).

We are fakes. Two-faced.

You can add to that list I know. In chapter 2 of this book, Bobby deals with all of these supposed valid arguments. But one thing he says is right on: “Christianity does not hold the corner to hypocrisy. It is a human problem.” (p.47). Ain’t that the truth? (Excuse my English).

We are called on by Jesus  to love others. “By this will all men know you are my disciples if you love one another.” That includes those outside of Jesus. The atheist. The evolutionist. The rebel. The gay. The women’s lib. Frankly, I don’t agree with any of those people’s philosophies, but I am to love them anyway. Hard? Sometimes. Essential? You bet. Can I do it on my own? Not a chance.

Do you make judgments based on first impressions? Does it cloud your perception? What do other perceive when they meet you?

 

33 Comments so far ↓

  1. Caleb Suko says:

    I think it’s pretty impossible not to make some sort of judgement based on first impressions. For me it’s about how firm I hold onto those judgements. For instance I might see a biker looking guy and think, looks like he’s a real lost soul, but I would try not to allow that feeling to dictate how I treat him or make big assumptions of how he might react to certain things. I’ve just been around long enough to know that sometimes those initial feelings/judgements are correct but often they aren’t.

  2. Daniel says:

    I am definitely one who makes very fast first impressions. But the way, as you can imagine, I haven’t always been right.

  3. I think everyone makes judgments based on first impressions – we’re just wired that way. As far as the first impression people get of me, normally an incredibly attractive, amazingly humorous, intelligent, and all around wonderful person. No, seriously, unfortunately I wonder if people think I’m quiet and shy. I tend to take a while to open up.

  4. the Old Adam says:

    Actually, Jesus said to “love one another”. Those IN the church.

    But He also said to love our enemies. I guess that could be those in …or out of the church.

    • Jeff says:

      I am curious what you mean by those “IN” the church. I don’t think there was a “Church” when Jesus was speaking.

      • cycleguy says:

        I’m going to agree Jeff in that there was no church. Jesus was specifically speaking to His disciples, but I do believe it can filter to all of us. Perhaps that is why Stephen said what he did. I’ll let him answer. And yes, Stephen, enemies can be in or out of the church.

      • the Old Adam says:

        His disciples and all those who believed. Those were the ones he was speaking to in that quote.

        They were the church.

  5. Jeff says:

    If you boarded a bus and there was a person in row 4 praying out loud would your first impression cause you to pick a seat closer or further from the praying person?

  6. I agree, it is hard not to make first impressions. But I do believe we can go back and reevaluate them often. I would want the same in return. I pray often that the Holy Spirit would reveal to me areas in my life that need to be worked on. Like he said, we are all human. We have many flaws. those who think they don’t should probably be praying/looking within twice as hard…

  7. Dave says:

    Oh, I couldn’t say what others perceive of me. I do hope they perceive some small measure of Christ in me. What is important is what I am thinking of them. Do I make judgments about appearance, the way they dress, their hair, etc.? Do I criticize their behavior, their attitude, etc.? Or, like the apostle James, do I acknowledge that he/she is the likeness of God, even though it may not be being expressed? I do my best to quell the first impressions, right or wrong, and focus on a totally unjudging love based on the qualities of a totally good Parent. I have found that people can feel it and respond accordingly. No words are necessary.

    Yes to the first two questions, I have done that.

    • cycleguy says:

      I can see you are a thoughtful person Dave-desiring to make sure your thoughts are not clouded with the wrong stuff, especially toward others. You are right in one aspect for sure: people can sense right off the bat how we feel about them-good or bad.

  8. TC Avey says:

    I was reading in 1 John about walking in the light. God impressed upon me that if I (and the church)am walking in the light there will be unity in the Body of Christ. Walking in love puts us in unity.

    it can be hard to love others, both inside and outside the church, but we are called to walk in the light as He is in the light.

    more and more I see that this Christian walk isn’t about me and my preferences…it’s about God and His preferences and He prefers ALL come into the Body of Christ.
    He created each person and loves them enough to die. If He loves them that much, I am to do the same.

    Sadly that can be difficult to do. thankfully I don’t’ have to do it in my own power. But it takes submitting myself to Him in all ways…submitting my time, talents, loyalty, preferences, understanding, knowledge, opinions, feelings, energy and so on to Him.

    • cycleguy says:

      As always TC a well-thought out comment. I do believe you hit on something we often forget: this is not about us. It is about Him and what He prefers. We get way too selfish and begin to think it is all about us. Submission is hard…but essential. Thanks.

      • TC Avey says:

        Well said, Bill. It’s not about us. It’s about Him.
        Submission is hard, but not impossible. It’s a choice we must daily make.
        God bless.

  9. Betty Draper says:

    I don’t worry so much about my first impression, it’s my second and third one that concerns me. Grace needs to happen in-between my first and second impression which will change my perspective. I agree totally with Bobby on “Christianity does not hold the corner to hypocrisy. It is a human problem.” All can be hypocritical about something…

  10. cycleguy says:

    From Pamela: I try not to judge people…but by the Grace of a Holy God…that could be me.
    I love all people, it is not my place to judge…we are to be discerning, but not judge mental…that is up to God.
    Hopefully others see a person who can overlook their mistakes (sins)…as we all sin, and fall short of the Glory of God…me included.

  11. Ceil says:

    Hi Bill! I definitely make decisions about people the first time I meet them. I think that’s human nature. Hopefully, I don’t let that get in the way of really listening, or changing my impressions later.
    Loving everyone is a tough thing. I have to love the people in ISIS? Yikes, that seems impossible. But Jesus loves them, and I am called to love them too. Really hard. But I’ll try to concentrate on the crimes, not the individual.
    Ceil

    • cycleguy says:

      hi Ceil. It is hard not to make those first impressions. But it is even harder to allow them to change over time. I know what you mean about loving others, especially our enemies.

  12. floyd says:

    I strive diligently not to judge others, but fail more than I should. I’ve lived a lifetime being judged and know the ugly traits first hand. None of us are perfect… that should be our first thoughts…

    • cycleguy says:

      One would think that having been judged we would be extra careful. Nope not me. Strange, but sometimes I need to really step back and look again.

  13. Bill, you have reached right to the very core when you say “hypocrisy is a human problem.” Isn’t that precisely why Jesus Christ came for us, died for us, rose for us, so we could shed our all-too-human foibles and learn to trust in God alone?
    Honestly, I no longer try to go by my first impressions of others, but I’m by no means totally there. I know I need to pray when I feel a need to judge someone else, and I’ll be the first to admit that I’m a work in progress. I just thank the Lord He hasn’t given up on me! Blessings!

    • cycleguy says:

      Humanness steps in and rears its ugly head too easily for me Martha. Try as I may to not be hard on others, I fail. But God hasn’t given up on me!! (Good thing)

  14. Nancy says:

    Amen! God does not call on us to agree with them, just to love them. I have been so sad for several people who are so hard and judgmental to their adult children and relatives that have strayed. They have lost their connection to be in the lives of those loved ones because they forget they are called on to love, that’s all. Pray, love, stay connected… How would you feel if they were gone in a blink of the eye tells me if your heart is with God…