Have you heard the story about the man who went to see his family doctor and was told, “Yes, indeed, you have rabies.” Upon hearing this, the patient immediately pulled out a pad and pencil and began to write.
Thinking the man was making out his will, the doctor said, “Listen, this doesn’t mean you’re going to die. There’s a cure for rabies.”
“I know that, ” said the man. “I’m makin’ a list of people I’m going to bite.”
We may chuckle at a story like that, but in reality it isn’t very funny. However, it does bring up a point. There comes a time in everyone’s life when revenge, or the desire to strike out at someone, comes into play. No one is immune when it comes to hurt and the desire to get even. Along the way we hear all sorts of reasons excuses for their display or failure to overlook someone’s fault(s).
- It’s my nationality.
- It’s my upbringing.
- It’s my red hair.
- It’s my personality.
There are more. And to make matters worse, I have seen and I am sure so have you, people who simply refuse to forgive. Revenge is at the top of their list. Just recently I had lunch with a young man who has gone through some struggles (that is how I met he & his wife). He has sought God’s forgiveness…and received it. He has sought his wife’s forgiveness…and received it. But a certain member of his extended family refuses to forgive. This person cannot let go of things from her past and wants to hold them against him.
Now…magnify that to a higher power. You now have the makings for the desire for revenge. David was slighted by the arrogance and just plain meanness of Nabal in I Samuel 25. He strapped on his sword and was ready to exact revenge on the dirty rotten scoundrel. But Abigail, Nabal’s wife, stepped in. (Forget all that talk about Abigail “marrying above her pay grade.” She was too good for him!) She got wind of what David was planning on doing and intervened with enough food to feed…well, an army. 
If David had given in to his warrior desire, his life would have been a real mess. Actually, in two consecutive chapters (I Samuel 24 & 25) David had a chance to exact revenge and didn’t.
Truth: Revenge is (not) sweet. It takes a toll on the person wanting it. My sermon Sunday is on revenge. I would appreciate your prayers. Meanwhile, what about you? Do you have trouble with revenge? Are you a vengeful person? How are you handling it? I’d love to hear from you.
Forgiveness is the hardest thing I’m struggling with right now. I know I have to, but I never feel the bile rise up in my throat when I see certain people. It really surfaced running into certain people the other night.
Will pray for your “health” and response to those people.
This really speaks to me right now. For the first time since I began blogging I had someone publicly criticize me. While it hurt, it has also toughened me up.
Not everyone- even Christians- are going to like me. And some are pretty vocal about that.
I’ve given it over to God, prayed for that person and resisted the temptation to retaliate. However, this post is helpful in reminding me to not continue to think upon the hurt. Satan keeps trying to tempt me to justify myself to this person, but God is showing me that He is in control and I must move past this.
Thanks for speaking to me today.
Yeah TC criticism will come.
It is important that we develop thick skin. I am sure you will continue to grow because of the criticism. When someone is critical (especially anonymous) the best is to leave it alone. Disregard anonymous.
When I was younger I was in the revenge business. As you wrote, it only really harms the one who carries the poison of revenge inside.
While difficult sometimes, I try to pray for the ones who have offended me. It is their fear and weakness that cause harm in the first place.
Praying for you and your flock.
Praying for the offender is tough but necessary Floyd. Well said. Thanks for the prayers.
Didn’t David end up marrying Abigail anyways?
I never was a vengeful person, at least I hope I wasn’t. I never did try to act out “an eye for an eye.” Although sometimes I was tempted to. But by the time I wanted to act, I just realized the person might have already forgotten what they did to deserve it, so I let it go.
Answer to your question: yes. Her husband just keeled over and his heart turned to stone. You stated a key element: time.
Hi Bill,
I don’t have trouble with revenge in my life. These type of feelings do surface at intermitent times but I soon get ahold of them.
I start thinking of these people as ‘people’. Fallen people who are pawns in the scheme of things. Without Christ they are lost souls without a ‘real’ ability to do what is right and to live their lives properly.
The love of God kicks in and that seems to end any anger or vengeful feelings for me.
However, I do believe in holding people accountable that are in positions of accountability. These people have taken on positions of authority that have mandates and sometimes legislation outlining their accountability. They should be held accountable for their failings to fullfil their duty and obligations.
Other people are counting on them to perform their jobs properly.
Seeing people as fellow “fallers” is helpful.
I had a problem with it when I was younger. I felt like I had no one on my side and so I would lash out at anyone who slighted me. Thank God He’s worked on that within me. Holding on to grudges and planning revenge is entirely too stressful.
Too stressful for sure Jason. Glad you are growing.
I have wanted revenge on a couple of people who hurt my sons terribly. Those thoughts consumed me day & night. I scared myself at the thoughts I was having, not thinking myself capable of wanting to do such harm to a person. It most definitely took a toll on me. When I finally gave these thoughts over to God, I found peace & have actually seen that these people are human just like me, and most importantly, when I realized they are a child of God, just like me, did my vengeful thoughts begin to fade & I have actually prayed for these people. I don’t struggle with revenge now as much as I used to, it’s amazing what God can do with the heart when we let Him. Great post Bill!
Glad God is showing you a “better way” Jan than wanting revenge. Our whole life will be consumed if we do.
Revenge is stupid