I started reading this book several days ago because I feel like I always need to hone my leadership skills. Above everyone else, I am totally aware of my shortcomings as a leader. Then I read this post and thought, “Why am I reading this book?” 
I am sure neither Dan nor the author would say, “Don’t read on leadership,” but it sure gave me a different perspective as I am reading this book.
I approached this book with one eye opened warily (for reasons that will remain private). I’m glad to say Dan struck a chord. I’d like to share a thought with you that I gleaned.
Dan puts great weight on the principle that leadership begins with relationship. He writes this:
People don’t exist to help us accomplish the mission; they are the mission. They are souls who must be treated with dignity and respect. Our leadership will rise to a new level when we genuinely see others as people we care about rather than as more work. Leaders, motivated by love, are called to serve others…Loving leaders serve without strings attached.
I don’t know about how you feel, but it doesn’t get much plainer than that. Nor as convicting. I stopped and asked myself, “How many times have I used people to further my agenda? How many times have I been motivated by less than pure motives? “ Truthfully, the questions don’t stop. Nor does the conviction they bring.
There certainly, without question, was no greater leader than Jesus. And just as certain there was NEVER anyone who was more of a servant than Him. Think about His time on earth. Do you ever read of a time where Jesus put strings on His relationship with His closest followers? He served them without expecting anything in return (though in the long run He did want their obedience and devotion), but He didn’t say, “I am doing this so you will do this.”
Frankly, I need to do better with this. But one thing I am now doing is stopping to ask myself about my motives. That is a good thing. The way I see it, I have some other serious questions to ask before I ask anything of others. Can I be counted on? Do I do what I say I will do? Do I genuinely care about the people I am working with? Can they trust me to do the right thing and get the job done? Am I serving them without attachments?
Lots to think about. Least for me it is. What about you? You may not want to answer publicly, and that’s okay, but ask yourself, “Can I be counted on?” “The Son of man did not come to be served but to serve…” Our Leader said that. Are you following?
You can get a hearty AMEN!on the quote from this corner. I would add that evangelism begins with a relationship. Yes, you can cover a crowd with a hand full of tracts. You can gather a crowd by putting one person on the hot spot and spend time trying to get them to admit they are sinners. But. Nothing says Jesus really loves you than a genuine, caring relationship – whether or not you personally EVER see that person come to Christ. Some sow. Some water….
You are so right Susan. Effective evangelism begins with a relationship established over time.
What if instead of focusing on leadership and leading, we focused on loving? I don’t mean touchy feely stuff. I mean wanting the best for people, even when that isn’t comfortable for them. Would that be true leadership?
Totally agree Larry. Jesus did just that.
Sometimes. Sometimes not. I am a sinner and do not serve (love the neighbor) as I ought.
Nor do I love God as I ought.
But, I repent, and tomorrow is another day.
We all fall into that trap if we are honest Steve. I know I have moments when it is all about me. Thanks.
I think your attitude makes a great deal of sense, not just in the ministry, but in the secular world as well. As a leader you can do your job and still not treat people like garbage. A lot of people do not seem to realize this. Thankfully, too, a lot of people do.
There will always be those enamored by position and not give a rip about caring. You pointed it out well Daniel.
Yes, I can be. It’s also caused me more trouble than I’d like to admit in life.
Sometimes that is a price we might have to pay.
Powerful post my brother. Somehow we have missed what Jesus was teaching in the gospels if we are not about serving others. I so agree it is all about relationships and it starts with our relationship with Christ.
People don’t exist to help us accomplish the mission; they are the mission. They are souls who must be treated with dignity and respect. Our leadership will rise to a new level when we genuinely see others as people we care about rather than as more work. Leaders, motivated by love, are called to serve others…Loving leaders serve without strings attached. (agree completely)
We just got a book called, Too Valuable To Lose. Thats how we need to see other Christians whether they are leaders or not. There have been times I have thought, oh if that couple would leave and go home with their problems it would be easier to minister to others. As if they were not as valuable as the ones who seem to handle thing better.
We have heard this often, leaderships deems themselves “us” and the rest of the body of Christ as “them”. This mentality shuts down any hope of helping relationship grow more Christlike.
God knows I want to be counted on.
But I must tell you brother I love the fact my husband is not on leadership anymore. OUr ministry of member care to our missinaries home on furlough has no agenda except to encouraged, we do not have to write up a report and give to leadership either. WE do give out options for the missionary we are meeting with if they are having or had a problem. Always directing them back to the Word for directions.
Good post, one I bet was difficult to write. Glad you did. Blessings
Thanks for your kind words Betty. It is hard to acknowledge weaknesses. Blogging can be a great way to hide and put on “airs.” I think you have pointed out a good trap to avoid: the “us” and “them” that creeps into leadership. “We” are in this together. Thanks.
It’s hard to completely forget about oneself… and the motives – no matter how hard I try, there are still background stories connected with other people. It’s odd, but I find it easier to serve complete strangers than the people I know (generally speaking – there are people for whom I would do almost anything).
What amazes me in Jesus’ relationships with His first 12 disciples is that He knew perfectly well, even before He called them, that on the day He would need them the most, they will all flee (and one of them will betray Him, another will say “I don’t know the guy”)… and yet He loved them and spent time with them… and in the long-run, it paid off (well, Judas is the odd one, but I think if he hadn’t committed a suicide, he would’ve come around too…)
I find myself fighting what you are writing about Zee. I want it to be about others but all often it isn’t. Jesus knew (as you pointed out) but still loved.
Selflessness is a tough thing but it is a needed thing in leadership and quite frankly in life.
I have moments where I can be counted on like this and moments where …..not so much.
Thanks Bill.
i struggle with that also Jim. I knew we were brothers!
Such a good topic, Bill. Our leader’s main objective was love. That needs to be mine too. Thank you for this challenge and reminder.
Exactly Eileen!
I’m not great at it, but I’m light years better than I was. I took the time this morning to have a cup of coffee with an acquaintance who lost his job a week ago. If someone would have told me I’d be doing this kind of stuff a decade ago I would have scoffed…
In the end, it’s exactly what we are called to do, care for others and their lives… God will take care of everything else. Since we are all human it’s good to hear and be reminded. We all need to do a heart check to make sure our motives are pure.
Thanks for your honesty Bill, it brings out the real in all of us.
So glad you took the time to be with your former coworker. That shows your heart has grown. That is cool. Doing a heart check is good. Thanks for the kind words Floyd.
Great reminder, Bill. Everything Jesus did was an invitation. An invitation to see the Father, to experience His goodness, to follow after Him… it wasn’t conditional or with strings attached. He went about doing good, healing ALL those oppressed by the devil. You’ve definitely got my mind running and that’s a good thing.
Thanks Bill.
I like that Jason: everything was an invitation. Keep running.
“People don’t exist to help us accomplish the mission; they are the mission.”
That’s pretty stinging right there. Wow.